Wednesday, July 23, 2008

McConaughey, girlfriend get "tribal" at birth


I've always been ambivalent about Matthew McConaughey. Yeah, he's got a sort of good ol' boy, pony kegs and football, hypermasculine charm. But he seems to spend a lot of time preening in public sans shirt, which is kind of asshatty. He hangs around with Lance Armstrong, who always seems a little jerky and pleased with himself. And he seems like the sort who would be a lot of fun to hang with until he says something kinda funky and semi-racist or just a little sexist, which makes you question how cool he really is...and you're supposed to overlook it because, well, he's just a fun, Texas boy...he don't mean no harm...but after a while, you start to wonder whether his comments are just ignorant or truly evil. (Am I the only one who has met this sort of guy?)

Anyway, this gem of a quote from OK magazine's article about the birth of McConaughey's son with Camila Alves rather irked me:

"We found a great rhythm," Matthew tells OK! about the delivery of baby Levi. "Contractions started kicking in. I sat there with her, right between her legs. We got tribal on it, we danced to it! I was DJ-ing this Brazilian music."

Tribal? Cause, you know those tribal women give birth differently than normal folk. The drums get going and the women shimmy, shake, pelvic thrust and booty drop until the baby pops out. WTF? I knew that shit would come out eventually.

The actor went on to say:

"I have it all chronicled," he explained. "Becoming a dad is something I've dreamed of doing since I was 10. Becoming a father felt very, very natural. We were jamming! She was sweating. No painkiller, let's go. She just clicked into that gear that only a woman has at a time like this. We'd been up for 40-something hours, and we went from dead tired to a really steadfast, 'Let's handle this... let's stay in the rhythm. Don't let the contraction be more than you.'"

"Don't let the contraction be more than you?" Why do I picture McConaughey dressed in a high school coach polyester pocket shirt and shorts, whistle around his neck, barking sports pep talk at Alves. "Feel the burn! Never let 'em see you sweat! 16...39....10....HUT! Aaaaargh!"

Just a little afternoon sillyness...



7 comments:

Symphony said...

40 hours? I got to the hospital at 7:40 and my son was delivered at 8:05. I was not playing around. lol.

Anonymous said...

Ugh! Thank god I'm not a heterosexual. This is just dreadful!

Clueless WW said...

*wow!* What is it with celebrities and idiotic birth stories? First Katie Holmes is supposed to go through birth without making a noise (thanks SO much for THAT brilliant idea, Scientology), now the Tribal Rhythm method...

Any time you get a story about how the father was an integral part of the birth process you kinda have to wonder. When the father's the one telling it, it sounds really implausible. I had my second with no painkillers; I wouldn't have done it without my spouse there holding my hand, but it was ME that got it done. If he tried to play Brazilian music or encourage me to be tribal, I would have thrown him out of the room.

And "Becoming a father felt very, very natural." -- just has to be followed up with, "I felt no pain at all!" or similar baloney. "We were jamming"... give me strength :-P

Miriam said...

Hi Tami,

If you REALLY want to get offended (lol) the book Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth is so loaded with doctors' (who are her opponents) quotes and almost always they refer to "certain women" as savages!!!

Its a great book for preparation for childbirth, but its tiresome to read these constant name callings.

Somebodies Friend said...

Just because I've occasionally made an asshatty type comment myself doesn't mean I don't give the misses 100% of the credit whenever credit is due.

Sometimes I think I deserve a little credit for other things that have happened in our relationsip though. Any sometimes it is just downright a group effort.

At the same time, I think I deserve credit sometimes. I can be a bit whitty myself and credit does not seem to find me as often as not that I would like but as often as it is deserved.

You can delude yourself into thinking the other party had no part in a given situation, but lets face it, if you are there, there you are. Even if your part is only 3% and the others is 97%, if you are in attendance you have a part in it, PERIOD.

Love you work Tami, it is sooooo stimulating, keep it up!

AJ Plaid said...

@ Clueless WW--If he tried to play Brazilian music or encourage me to be tribal, I would have thrown him out of the room.

LOL

Friend, after reading this, I still wanna throw McConaughey out the room, whatever room he's in, on GP (general principle).

possumstew said...

Late to the party, but...this:

"The drums get going and the women shimmy, shake, pelvic thrust and booty drop until the baby pops out."

(*DEAD*)

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