Originally published in January 2011. Given Chris Brown's latest controversy, followed by yet another disingenuous apology, I thought I'd leave this right here:
Who knew one could find valuable life lessons on the wall of a sandwich shop?
I was waiting for my Italian Night Club at Jimmy John's when I spied a lesson on giving proper apologies. I paraphrase:
1. I was wrong
2. I'm sorry I hurt you
3. How can I make it better?
So simple. It's astounding so many public people apologize so poorly. (Cough...Keith Olbermann...cough)
Here is another important thing to know about apologies: Sometimes they are simply not enough. Sometimes they change nothing. Sometimes the only way to prove you regret a certain action is to commit to longterm education and a change of behavior. Sometimes anything less is an offense.
Just last week, the convicted abuser who assaulted then-girlfriend Rihanna nearly two years ago in a beating heard round the world, was showing off his certificate for completing a 52 week domestic violence course. But the man who announced last year he wanted to be "a role model" -- who said, "I want to definitely be a man and learn who I am and learn how to control emotions" -- behaved like neither a role model nor a real man when singer Raz-B offhandedly tweeted, "Im just sittin here Thinking how can niggas like @ebenet & @ChrisBrown disrespect women as Intelligent as @HalleBerry11 @Rihanna." That seems to have been sufficient provocation to undo all that anger management Brown's been striving toward. He swiftly – and crudely -- shot back, "nigga you want attention! Grow up nigga!!! Dick in da booty ass lil boy."
Ah, the old "You're such a homo" retort. Always a classic. Brown soon followed it up with another charmer: "Tell me this @razb2k!! Why when the money was coming in u won't complaining about getting butplugged! #homothug!!!" Read more at Salon...Oh, but don't worry ya'll, Brown has "apologized!"
"Yesterday was an unfortunate lack in judgment sparked by public Twitter attacks from Raz-B, who was bent on getting attention," Brown said of the virtual feud. "Words cannot begin to express how sorry and frustrated I am over what transpired publicly on Twitter. I have learned over the past few years to not condone or represent acts of violence against anyone." Read more at MTV...Also...
"I love all of my fans, gay and straight," Brown went on to say. "I have friends from all walks of life and I am committed, with God's help, to continue becoming a better person."Well, glad that's all cleared up.